Fresh Off Plane, Her OB Told Me To Abstain

Summary

My pregnant wife was in excruciating pain, so I rushed her to the ER.

After filling out the admission forms, the doctor gave me an earful:

"Look, intercourse during pregnancy is generally safe, but you need to cut back! And when you do, take it easy on her."

Those words hit me like a bucket of ice water.

I'd been on a business trip for two weeks and just got back today. I hadn't even laid a hand on her.

1.

I asked the doctor in a low voice:

"Could masturbation cause issues too?"

The female doctor shot me a dirty look: