His Fifty Thousand Dollar Pet Bird
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Summary
My boss, Weston Perry, ran a fever of 107.6 degrees last month. Once his temperature finally broke, he woke up convinced I was a cockatiel.
He bought an entire bookshelf’s worth of parrot care manuals. One of the highlighted rules read:
"Cockatiels require at least two hours of daily vocal interaction with their owners to prevent depression."
So, this ruthless titan of the Chicago business world, universally feared in every corporate boardroom, sat in front of me every single day reading quarterly financial reports.
When he finished, he’d ask me in this incredibly gentle, nurturing voice:





