My Online Boyfriend Fired Me Today

Summary

I’d started to notice a pattern: every single time my long-distance, text-only boyfriend and I got into a fight, our high-strung CEO would force the entire department to work overtime.

It was uncanny. So, sitting at my desk, I finally typed out a message to him: "Every time we fight, I end up stuck at work. I think we need to break up. You’re bad luck."

Less than a minute after hitting send, disaster struck.

Panic-stricken, I furiously tapped out another text: "I’m not even kidding, you really are a curse! The boss just announced he's cutting our salaries! Let's block each other. Goodbye."