Taming the Obsessive Vampire Next Door
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Summary
I have a severe, uncompromising obsession with emotional exclusivity.
Whoever I date has to give me every single first: first handhold, first kiss, first love. They aren’t allowed to look at anyone else, talk to anyone else, or entertain a passing thought that doesn’t revolve around me. Once they choose me, they are mine forever.
People on the internet used to joke that with standards like mine, I’d have to stake out a hospital maternity ward and wait eighteen years.
Then, one evening, translucent lines of text—like a live video chat stream—began flickering across my field of vision:
