The Slacker & the Savage Merman

Summary

When I found out the villain was a merman who cried pearls, I fished the pregnancy test I’d thrown out of the trash.

Then I went to the roof.

"So, uh, how many do you mermen have at once? And do they eat fish food or formula?"

Justin, who had been in the middle of a dramatic suicide attempt, slipped and nearly plummeted from the eighteenth floor.

I shook my head and sighed. "You know what? Never mind. I’ll just throw it in the ocean after it’s born."

Later, after the baby was born, Justin didn't even dare to sleep, terrified I'd take our child and release it into the wild.