Chapter 1

When my parents divorce, they agree that my brother Zane Powell and I will each live with one of them for a year at a time, switching back and forth.

But every single year, when it's time to switch before school starts, they always end up fighting over Zane.

"Zane, would you like to travel with me over the Fourth of July?"

My dad, Jim Powell, frowns. "Zane is staying with me this year. Don't get involved."

My mom, Martha Zane, sneers. "I was away for work and left him with you for 17 days last year. I want those days back!"

"It wasn't even a full 17 days. It was only 16 days and 8 hours."

Zane sighs. "It would be great if I could split myself in half."

After arguing for a long time, Mom and Dad finally compromise.

Over the Fourth of July holiday, they take Zane to Avloria Island together.

Zane asks, "What about Dane?"

Dad looks away. "Dane isn't staying with me this year."

Mom, who has barely looked at me since she walked in, finally lays her eyes on me. "I'm busy with work this year. I don't want to take care of you. Go stay with your grandparents."

I clench my fists under the table until my nails dig into my palms.

Just moments ago, she was fighting Dad over the days she had lost with Zane.

But now, she is already finding an excuse to leave me behind.

Just then, my homeroom teacher, Raymond Dunn, texts me. "You got good results from both summer programs. Southia College is in the next state over. You should consider it."

I reply, "Mr. Dunn, I'll choose the one in Marlow."

1,200 miles should be enough to leave the first half of my life of being unwanted behind.

Chapter 1

My homeroom teacher, Raymond Dunn, asked me, "Have you discussed it with your parents yet?"

I typed, "Nope. But I'm 18 already. I can take responsibility for the decisions I make."

I kept my head down and stared at my phone, not saying anything.

Zane Powell glanced over at me and raised an eyebrow. "I think Dane doesn't want to go to our grandparents' house."

He was right. I really didn't want to go.

If I stayed there, I'd have to get up before dawn to make breakfast for everyone, then do laundry for my two cousins after school.

I didn't want to do that again.

My mom, Martha Zane, frowned. "Dane, can't you think about us for once? This is a critical time for my promotion. I'll be busy with work. If I don't do a good job taking care of you, you'll get upset and ignore me again."

My dad, Jim Powell, nodded. "Exactly. Dane has always had a temper. Last year, I missed his parent-teacher conference, and he gave me the cold shoulder for a whole week. Anyone who didn't know better would think he was the one paying my bills."

Mom shook her head, clearly disappointed. "Zane just started high school. Your dad wanted to see how he was doing, so he went to your brother's parent-teacher conference. Why do you have to be so difficult?"

I let go of the phone case, my nails having left little marks all over it. I looked up at them. "Oh, is sophomore year really that important? Then how come no one came to my parent-teacher conference when I was a sophomore?"

Mom averted my gaze at first, but she quickly regained her composure. "Zane was a freshman then. Of course we have to prioritize him first."

Dad nodded. "Seriously? You're still bringing up the past over this? Freshman year is way more important than sophomore year."

I couldn't stomach another bite, dropping my cutlery onto the table. "Zane and I weren't even at the same school, and our conferences weren't even on the same day. Stop making excuses. The truth is neither of you really cared about me!"

Mom didn't know what to say, while Dad tried to wash his hands of it. "You weren't living with me that year. You can't blame me for not showing up."

Zane clanged his fork against the bowl. "That's enough, Dane. We only get to eat together like this around New Year's and when school starts. Why are you bringing all this up now?

"Maybe Mom was just busy with work and forgot. It's just a parent-teacher conference. Do you really have to hold it against her?"

Just a parent-teacher conference?

It wasn't just one. It was ten years of missed parent-teacher conferences.

Even before my parents divorced, there had already been times when they were no-shows at my parent-teacher conferences.

Last year, a girl who helped handle financial aid applications pulled me aside. "Dane, this might be a little rude, but I just want to make sure. Is your family having money problems? Do you want to apply for financial aid?"

I was confused.

She lowered her voice. "One of your middle school classmates said you might not have anyone at home, so I thought I'd ask if you needed help."

So basically, she thought I was an orphan.

My face felt hot, but I wasn't angry or offended. I just felt sad.

For years, none of my classmates had ever seen my parents at school—not at parent-teacher conferences, not even when a new school year started. So people noticed, and they started making up all kinds of stories.

The girl had always been nice to me. I knew she was only trying to help.

I gave her a small smile. "I'm not an orphan. I don't need any financial aid. Thanks for asking."

Because of all this, I kept reminding Dad last year that he had to come to my parent-teacher conference.

He said he would, but when he got to school, he went straight to the sophomore building instead.

I watched him leave through the window. The joy I felt when I first saw him slowly turned into disappointment as he walked away.

For years, I just let it go. I just wanted to keep the peace at home. But somehow, I was still the one they called bad-tempered and petty.

Looking back, I should've stopped putting up with them years ago.

I accidentally brushed against my screen, and it lit up. The words "Marlow College" appeared before my eyes. I swallowed the lump in my throat and smiled.

It didn't matter. I wouldn't have to put up with it anymore.

Chapter 2

Nobody seemed to notice the change in my mood.

After Zane finished saying his piece, everyone seemed to take it as the end of the matter. They assumed I should know better than to keep dwelling on it.

My family soon returned to their meal as if nothing had happened, and before long, Zane's bowl was piled high with food.

Anything involving Zane seemed to turn into a competition between Mom and Dad, each trying to outdo the other.

"Zane, eat the meat I cooked for you. Your dad cooked his."

"Zane, don't listen to your mom. Hers is still half raw. You'll get sick if you eat that."

They kept calling his name. Sometimes, they'd be talking with food in their mouths, and for a split second, I'd hear it wrong and think they were calling me.

But whenever I looked up, my parents weren't even looking at me.

Zane's name used to be James.

When Mom and Dad divorced, Mom would rather have walked away with nothing than let Zane keep Dad's family name. She insisted that his last name be changed to hers.

The two of them ended up in a huge fight outside the courthouse.

I was still little then. I tried to pull them apart as I shouted, "Mom, I'll take your last name. Change mine instead. Please stop fighting."

Mom pulled away from me impatiently. "I don't want you to take my last name."

I was stunned as she shoved me onto the ground.

In the end, it was only when Zane started crying from fear that they finally backed down. They decided to let him keep Dad's last name, but took Mom's last name and used it as his given name instead.

That was how my brother became Zane Powell, a name that seemed to carry all the love and favoritism my parents had for him.

After dinner, Mom put an arm around Zane's shoulders and said to me, "He's switching dorms. Your dad's a man, so he won't be much help packing. I need to help him. You can take the bus to school by yourself tomorrow."

I called after her. "Mom, you still haven't paid my tuition for this year."

Mom didn't even turn around to look at me. She said, "I've already paid Zane's tuition. Your dad can pay yours."

Dad glared at her. "You even have to beat me to this? I was supposed to pay for Zane's."

He transferred the money to me reluctantly, then looked at me suspiciously. "With how slow and stubborn you are, your grades probably aren't anything to brag about either, huh? Can you even get into college? Don't waste the money your mom and I worked so hard to earn, okay?"

I nodded, my expression blank.

I was ranked in the top three in my grade. Every one of my classmates' parents knew about that. The only ones who didn't were my own parents.

They hadn't cared about me before.

They didn't need to start caring now.

Chapter 3

On the first day of school, we had a ceremony, and I was the only one whose parents didn't show up.

Two of my classmates had parents working out of state, but one parent still came all the way back for it.

Meanwhile, my parents were only a few hundred yards away in the dorm, helping Zane get settled into his new dorm.

Neither of them was willing to spare the time to come to my ceremony.

It was almost my turn when I suddenly saw Mom and Dad approaching, both looking irritated.

The mother of one of my old elementary school classmates waved at me enthusiastically. "Dane, your parents went the wrong way and showed up a little late."

A mocking smile appeared on my face.

They were probably afraid someone they knew would see them as bad parents, so they reluctantly came over and stood beside me.

Mom was obviously impatient. She complained, "How long will this take? Zane is still waiting in his dorm for me to bring him something to eat."

Dad folded his arms, acting like it had nothing to do with him. "You'll go through the ceremony with Dane later. After all, it's your turn to take care of him this year."

Mom glanced at the students ahead of us posing for pictures. Her brows furrowed. "No, I'm not doing it. It's too embarrassing with everyone watching. You do it."

Dad wasn't having it. "I'm not doing some ridiculous show in front of everyone."

They started arguing under their breath, so caught up in it that neither of them even noticed when the teacher called my name.

I didn't bother asking them to stop fighting. Instead, I walked right past them and went through the ceremony alone.

If Zane had been the one who needed Mom and Dad to go through the ceremony with him, would they have acted like this?

Of course not.

My best friend was waiting for me on the other side. When I told him how Mom and Dad had acted, he looked both angry and confused. He couldn't understand why my parents favored Zane so much.

I said calmly, "I used to think I must have done something wrong. So I made sure I was always at the top of my class. I stopped asking for snacks and toys. I learned how to do all kinds of chores and became the well-behaved, responsible kid everyone praised.

"But my parents still acted the same way. They never changed.

"I finally realized that favoritism doesn't have to make sense. I'm not going to keep trying to change them anymore. From now on, I'll think of myself… as an orphan."

Chapter 4

The Fourth of July holiday soon came around. I spotted Dad's car as soon as I walked out of school.

I waited there for a while, and sure enough, Mom, Dad, and Zane soon came out together.

Mom was carrying Zane's clothes for him to change into at home, while Dad had his backpack over his shoulder.

They'd been laughing and talking, but the moment they spotted me, all three of them went quiet.

Mom stood by the car door, clearly on guard. "You like reading, so just go to the bookstore over the holiday. You can't swim, so it's not safe for you to go to the beach."

I glanced at her, then at Dad, who still hadn't unlocked the car, finding the situation ridiculous.

They thought I'd come to ruin their upcoming family trip.

I said, "I just want my living expenses. What am I supposed to eat if you leave?"

Mom exhaled in relief. She rummaged through her bag before tugging on Dad's arm. "Jim, do you have any cash? Give him some. I don't have money on me, and my phone died."

Dad didn't budge. He retorted, "You should be the one taking care of him. Why should I pay for him? You keep dumping his expenses and problems on me. Can you stop being such an asshole?"

I slowly clenched the bills in my hand, my heart breaking at the same time.

Annoyed, Mom grabbed Dad, accidentally pulling Zane's backpack off his shoulder. The zipper came undone, revealing a thick stack of 100-dollar bills.

When Zane saw me staring at the money in his backpack, he immediately picked it up and hugged it protectively against his chest. "Mom gave me this because my grades improved. It's not yours! Don't even think about taking my money!"

"Alright, Dane. Just go home for now. I'll charge my phone and transfer the money to you later," Mom quickly said.

I asked, "He improved? By how much?"

Dad announced proudly, "A few points! Every point on the SAT can put him ahead of thousands of other students! Zane just beat out 10,000 people. Of course we have to reward him."

So just like that, they rewarded him with 2,000 dollars?

I found it ridiculous.

The juniors' exams had been so easy this time that even the seniors had heard about it. The average score had gone up quite a bit. Zane's score had barely improved, which actually meant he'd done worse than before.

I just didn't believe that Mom, who had been to college herself, couldn't see that from the score report.

This was no different from all the times she'd favored Zane. If she wanted to give him money, she'd find a reason to do so. It didn't matter if that reason made any sense.

Mom looked at me impatiently. "Enough, Dane. Stop sulking. I already asked your classmates. Your score dropped this time. If there are rewards, there will be punishments too. Since you're so hung up on this, why don't you pay a 3,000 dollars fine first?"

I almost laughed.

The math paper had been brutally difficult this time, yet I'd only lost a few points overall. It was enough for Mr. Dunn to praise me for three days straight.

Yet in my parents' eyes, I was still a failure.

"You knew how much my score had changed. But do you know how much I scored?"

Mom was unbothered. "Your classmate told me, but I was in a hurry, so I didn't hear. Anyway, that's not the point. We're heading to the airport now. We're done talking. You little freeloader, I'll transfer the money to you. Happy now?"

The next day, Mom still hadn't sent me my living expenses.

I texted her, but she didn't reply.

She did, however, have time to edit photos of Zane and post them on social media.

I texted Dad too, but he just told me to ask Mom.

I'd long since gotten used to things like this, yet the sense of being unwanted and passed off between them still managed to hurt.

Every Sunday night before the start of a new school week, they would call each other to make sure Zane had enough money for school.

Whenever one of them had to go out of town for work, they would reluctantly send Zane to stay with the other for a few days, worried that Zane wouldn't eat well or sleep well on his own.

It wasn't that they had bad memories or were irresponsible.

They just didn't love me.