Chapter 1

I was sitting at a long red light on my way to meet Caleb at the hospital, so I pulled out my phone to kill time.

The top recommended post on Reddit caught my eye:

[Life, Freedom, Love, and Money: How would you rank them?]

The comments section was chaotic, but the vast majority ranked Money first.

Only one comment stood out, completely at odds with the rest.

"Love will always be my first choice. With love, everything else has meaning."

Someone immediately replied mockingly: "Another hopeless romantic."

But looking at that comment, a faint sense of agreement rippled through me.

Of course love should come first.

The love Caleb had given me had always been flawless.

Amidst the chorus of cynical replies, the original commenter responded calmly:

"If you were in my shoes, you'd choose the same."

"Last year, I went into acute renal failure. He gave me one of his kidneys. At the time, he wasn't even my boyfriend; he was just my attending physician."

My heart inexplicably skipped a beat.

Last year, Caleb had also donated a kidney.

To a patient he supposedly didn't even know.

I had fiercely opposed it at the time, but he just coaxed me, saying:

"Saving lives is a doctor's calling."

My fingertips went cold. With a trembling hand, I scrolled down.

"He only has one kidney left now, but in that department... he's still so intense it's hard to keep up."

The comment continued, "Broad shoulders, narrow waist. Every night he tosses me around until my back aches."

Attached below was a photo.

Under the dim, amber glow of bathroom lighting, it showed a man's muscular back.

On the left side of his waist, there was a faint bite mark.

It was the bite mark I left on him when I was eighteen, punishing him for getting into a fistfight with a senior who had a crush on me.

It wasn't until a chorus of honking horns erupted behind me that I snapped back to reality.

I was still twenty minutes away from Caleb's hospital.

I abruptly pulled the car onto a side street and turned off the engine.

I frantically reopened that Reddit thread.

The tone in the comments had shifted completely.

"What? In the 21st century, pure romance like this still exists? You've made me believe in love again."

The poster continued her calm narrative:

"His parents divorced when he was young, and no one wanted him. Even though he's highly successful now, deep down in his bones, he's still just a child desperate for love."

My heart gave a sharp, painful throb.

"I grew up in the foster system, so I guess we're kindred spirits. I have nothing to give him but love, but that's exactly what he lacks the most."

"As long as we can heal each other, that's enough. Even if he's married... I don't care. I just want to spend whatever days I have left by his side."

The comments section exploded with a screen full of question marks.

But she seemed oblivious, continuing to write:

"I'm dying. I don't have much time left. I was afraid of hurting him, so I rejected him many times. But every time I saw his defeated, heartbroken look, I couldn't bring myself to do it."

"Time is too short, and our meeting was too beautiful. We'll just be together for as long as we can."

The final comment.

"Attaching a photo of us."

I stared at that line of text. The screen brightness stung my eyes, and the loading circle for the photo spun endlessly, making my eyes burn.

My finger hovered over the screen, unable to tap it.

The answer, practically screaming at me, felt like a hand wrapping tightly around my throat, choking me.

Thump— A very light sound.

I violently snapped back to reality. In my rearview mirror, a girl's electric scooter had tipped over against my rear bumper. She was scrambling frantically to pick it up.

She was slender and fragile-looking, wearing a faded white hoodie.

Watching her jog toward my window, my heart suddenly gave a weird, unprompted lurch.

"I'm so sorry! I'm so, so sorry!" She bent over, pressing her palms against my window, her face full of panic. "It's my first time riding an e-bike, I couldn't brake in time... I'm really sorry..."

The car window was fogged up.

Her face was obscured by a blurry layer of condensation, making it hard to see clearly.

But that silhouette, those eyes... they gave me a sudden, inexplicable premonition.

I took a deep breath, and my thumb finally tapped the screen.

The instant the photo loaded, I heard my own breathing stop.

On the screen, Caleb was looking down slightly, his eyes so tender you could drown in them.

Wrapped in his arms was a girl, wearing a white hoodie, tilting her face up and smiling at him.

It was the exact same girl standing outside my car window.

The world suddenly went completely silent.

So quiet that all I could hear was my heartbeat. Thump. Thump. Pounding so hard my entire body ached.

I slowly raised my head.

On the window, her hands were still pressed against the glass, her mouth still moving, saying something.

My eyes suddenly began to sting.

By the time Caleb arrived, the air was unnervingly quiet.

Ten minutes ago, the girl had made a phone call.

Separated by the car window, one of us standing, one of us crouching.

Neither of us had said another word.

Until that familiar SUV turned the corner.

Until that familiar figure power-walked toward us.

Until Caleb, without even glancing at my car, walked straight to her and crouched by her legs.

"Being naughty again. Didn't I tell you to stay home and rest?"

He pulled a bottle of Betadine and some Q-tips from his pocket, expertly cleaning the scrape on her knee.

The girl giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck:

"I'm fine, see? I just wanted to come out and buy some groceries. It's your birthday today, I wanted to do something special."

"You can't afford to get hurt again." Caleb kept his head down, meticulously cleaning the tiny scratch on her knee. "I don't need any special celebrations. I just need you to be safe."

"I know, I know~"

I stepped out of my car.

"The repair will be about two grand. I'll accept cash to settle it privately."

Under the moonlight, Caleb's head snapped up, his face instantly draining of all color.

"Chloe..." He opened his mouth.

I didn't let him finish.

"You got here fast." I pointed at him, then pointed at the girl shrinking behind him. "From the time you answered her call to right now, fifteen minutes. That's enough for me to see exactly where she stands in your heart."

The wind whipped down my collar, and I suddenly felt freezing cold.

"Caleb."

I called his name.

This name, I had been calling it since I was ten years old. For fifteen years.

I had called him to wake up, called him to eat, called him to say "I love you," called him to say "I'll wait for you."

I had never felt so exhausted doing it.

"How could you do this to me?"

He didn't speak.

The girl shrank further behind him.

I stared at her for a long time.

Long enough for Caleb to take a half-step forward, shielding her even more completely.

That single movement hurt more than any photo I could have seen.

I didn't say another word. I turned, opened my car door, and accelerated away a split second before my tears broke like a dam.

In the rearview mirror, he was still standing there, one arm protectively hovering over her, his eyes following my car.

Under the dim amber glow of the streetlights, that face that had made my heart flutter countless times suddenly looked like a stranger I had never met.

I drove faster and faster, my memories playing like a movie reel in my mind.

At ten, the day his parents abandoned him, he moved in next door to me.

Skinny as a rail, I stole food from my house every day and passed it to him over the balcony.

He cried as he scarfed down the food, saying between bites, "I owe you. Thank you."

At eighteen, he held himself back a year in school just so we could go to the same college.

When a senior tried to give me a love letter, Caleb rushed him and beat him black and blue.

I was so angry I yelled at him and bit his side. He wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth with red-rimmed eyes:

"Chloe, I like you too. Be my girlfriend, please?"

On the dorm roof, he kissed me for the first time. After the kiss, he picked me up and spun me around, laughing like an idiot:

"Chloe, this is the happiest day of my life... Thank you, for healing me time and time again."

At twenty-two, on his first day as a resident, he proposed to me in front of everyone, swearing he would only love me for the rest of his life.

When I chose to move out of state for a career opportunity, he helped me convince my parents, then firmly told me:

"Chloe, you chase your dreams. I'll be your safety net."

Every single weekend, without fail, he drove three hours just to see me.

Rain or shine.

For over a thousand days, he never let me spend a weekend alone.

Every night we spent hours on the phone, we always had endless things to talk about.

Every anniversary I neglected because of work, he always had a surprise overflowing with love prepared.

Regarding the fact that he loved me, I don't think I had ever doubted it.

But I didn't understand. I truly didn't understand.

How can one person's heart hold two completely different loves at the same time?

My eyes suddenly burned intensely.

The wind rushed in through the half-open window, stinging my eyes.

But what hurt more was the heart that had loved him for so many years.

I whipped the steering wheel around and headed back to my apartment in the city.

Eighty miles. I cried so hard I couldn't see the road, taking three hours to get back.

My best friend, Maya, was waiting at the door, holding a birthday cake, her face full of anticipation:

"You're back already? How did it go? Caleb must have lost his mind when you told him you're pregnant, right?"

Today was Caleb's birthday.

It was also the day I planned to tell him I was pregnant.

My job transfer had been approved; I could finally move back to his city.

So the second I got off work, I couldn't wait to rush to him.

I wanted to tell him face-to-face that we were going to have a baby, that the long-distance was over, and that for every weekend from now on, we would never have to be apart again.

But instead, I stumbled upon that sickening scene.

Like a nightmare I couldn't wake up from.

I looked at Maya, my eyes burning, and the composure I had been desperately maintaining finally shattered:

"He's cheating on me. With the girl he donated his kidney to."

Maya froze for three seconds, then her eyes turned redder than mine out of pure rage.

The next second, she was crying and cursing Caleb and his ancestors back to the Stone Age.

I completely broke down, collapsing into her arms.

She had witnessed my fifteen years with Caleb since we were ten.

When Caleb was about to give up on college because he couldn't afford tuition, I stole my parents' savings passbook for him, and my dad whipped my back until it was covered in bloody welts.

When I worked twenty days straight, pulling all-nighters to secure a project promotion just so I could request a transfer back to his city.

When Caleb went abroad for a fellowship for six months, and I broke my leg and lay in the hospital, terrified to tell him a single word so he wouldn't worry.

Every time, her heart ached for me. She called me an idiot and asked if it was worth it.

I told her it was worth it. Caleb had had it too hard. He only had me. I needed to be good to him, and then even better to him.

She knew I loved Caleb more than I loved myself.

So now, with snot and tears streaming down her face, she cried and cursed.

Cursing him for being blind, cursing him for being an ungrateful wolf, cursing him to die a horrible death.

I slumped by the toilet, crying and throwing up simultaneously:

"I want a divorce."

"I am not giving birth to the child of a piece of trash like Caleb."

"I want Caleb to rot in hell."

3:00 AM.

I was curled up in the corner of the sofa, watching the neon lights of the city blink outside the window.

Maya couldn't stay awake any longer and had fallen asleep leaning on my shoulder, tear tracks still drying on her face.

I used to think that a good relationship relied on fireworks, moonlight, bouquets of roses brought across state lines, and relying on surviving a thousand miserable moments and ten thousand tearful embraces.

Now I finally understood: love relies on having a conscience.

The front door was suddenly pushed open from the outside.

It was Caleb.

"Chloe, me and Serena... it's not what you think."

Men all have a savior complex.

They always think they're gods; they always want to rescue someone.

So Caleb, with red eyes, told me:

The very first time he saw Serena, his heart softened.

Penniless, riddled with disease, only twenty years old, suffering from acute renal failure, and because she had no money, she was unwillingly forced to give up treatment.

When he said these words, his tone was completely saturated with heartbreak.

But he didn't know that as I listened, I only had one thought in my head:

So, she reminded him of himself at ten years old.

That abandoned, unwanted boy whose parents divorced.

That starving boy who I secretly fed and gave stolen money to.

When he looked at her, he saw his past self.

So he gave her a kidney without a second thought.

Just like back then, when I gave him a bowl of food.

"And then?" I finally spoke, my voice calmer than I expected. "Because you pitied her, you fell in love with her? You wanted a dying person to feel loved?"

"Caleb, you're a doctor, not a god. You don't need to immolate yourself to save someone else."

"What about me, then?" I looked at him. "What am I?"

Just because I was too whole, too strong, too independent to need saving.

Therefore, I could be sacrificed. I could be abandoned for his "greater love."

I leaned back against the sofa, swallowing every single one of those words back down my throat.

The neon lights outside were still flashing red, green, and yellow, exactly as they were a few hours ago.

But I knew there was no going back.

Caleb was still standing in the entryway, covered in the dust of his rush over, his eyes exhausted.

He was waiting. Waiting for me to understand him, waiting for me to forgive him, waiting for me to throw myself crying into his arms and say "it's okay."

"You don't need to explain anything to me." I heard my own voice say. "And I have no way of understanding you."

"Let's get a divorce."

He froze.

It seemed he never expected me to be so resolute. The hope in his eyes extinguished bit by bit, and his shoulders slumped.

Then he took a deep breath, looked up, and his eyes were terrifyingly cold.

"Chloe, how can you be so cold-blooded?"

"I just wanted her to finish her life without regrets. Is that a crime? Is your entire world just about romantic love? Are human lives just weeds to you?"

I was stunned.

Honestly, I thought I had already cried all my tears for today.

At least, from discovering Serena sharing their romantic daily life on social media, to the accident scene, watching their sweet interaction.

I had maintained my dignity. I hadn't become hysterical.

I even tried to convince myself: getting cheated on is fine, just consider my true heart fed to a dog.

I'm only twenty-five. I can still start over.

But the tears still fell, triggered by Caleb's baffling accusation.

Like pearls off a broken string, they cascaded down uncontrollably.

"I'm cold-blooded?" I heard my voice trembling.

"Yeah, if I were truly cold-blooded, I should have let you starve to death when you were ten."

His face changed.

"Caleb, anyone in the world can criticize me, but you are the absolute last person who has the right to."

My face was covered in tears. I wiped at them awkwardly, but more just kept coming.

He watched me cry, wanting to step forward but not daring to.

His eyes were so complex I couldn't read them. Then, he spoke.

"Chloe."

"Serena's transplant failed. She needs a kidney."

My heart suddenly stopped beating, and my tears stopped too.

"Could you... could you please find it in your heart... to save her?"

The world went silent.

"Are you even human?!"

Maya woke up at some point, lunged forward, and slapped Caleb hard across the face.

She cried and cursed:

"A gold-digging scrub like you should die in Serena's bed! Didn't you say she was dying? How do you still have the mood to post about your sex life online?"

"Go piss in a puddle and look at your reflection! If Chloe hadn't taken pity on you, you wouldn't even have the right to stand here and talk to her!"

Caleb covered his face, cursed so badly he couldn't say a single word.

I looked at him and suddenly smiled.

"Disgusting."

I stood up and walked up to him.

"Caleb, you make me feel like these past years of my life were nothing but a joke."

I didn't give him a chance to speak.

"You still have one kidney left. You can donate it to her."

"We're getting a divorce. Tomorrow."

"Don't make me look down on you even more."