I Got a Vasectomy, She Got Knocked Up

Summary

My wife, Anne Baker, wants to remain childfree, so I decide to get a vasectomy.

But on our way home, she hands me an ultrasound scan. "I'm three months pregnant, and the baby isn't yours."

I look at her in shock. She smiles and points at the BMW behind us.

"I didn't want to tell you I had a one-night stand, but I accidentally got knocked up. An abortion is bad for my body, so I decided to keep the baby."

I grip her hand tightly as I say furiously, "So you lied to me? You were lying about wanting to be childfree!"